Shell Shocked: The day my horoscope came true
Among the many emails that flood my computer screen every day is a daily horoscope. I click on it to see what kind of day it says I’m going to have. I can safely say that I’m not a big believer in astrology but it’s still fun to read horoscopes.
My daily horoscopes are generally positive, encouraging and optimistic. I’ve never come across one that says I’m going to have a miserable day. Have you? I’m invariably told that all my dreams and yearnings would come true if I followed the instructions and directions to the letter. The horoscopes tell me that I have the power to do anything I want, so long as I stay true to myself. All of my dreams will come true if I can overcome my pathetic neuroses, self-doubts and skepticism. If I do so I will succeed at absolutely everything.
Do I believe in the power and accuracy of horoscopes? Not really. But one time it hit the nail on the head.
About two years ago the daily horoscope told me that I would be meeting a woman that day with whom I would bond. When I read that I thought that the astrologist had lost her senses. I’d been widowed for five years and had no interest in meeting anyone at all despite my friends encouraging me to do so.
It’s one thing for a horoscope to be general in nature and predict such things as “if you seek ye shall find.” Or “if you let the sunshine in you’ll need sun screen.” Or “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” These aphorisms could apply to just about anyone without making a significant dent in your life.
But to be so specific as to advise me that I’d be meeting a woman that day, well that took a bit of chutzpah on the part of the astrologist. After all, the same horoscope was appearing on computer screens of thousands of other men throughout the country. I could have been happily married as far as the astrologist knew. Wasn’t it a calculated risk to make such a prediction? It was totally impossible for an astrologist to single me out and be accurate.
I began to think about unsubscribing to this daily horoscope when I heard the sound of boiling water on the stove and began to boil some eggs, forgetting about the horoscope.
Then it was time to drive to get my monthly haircut. There was a lot of traffic that morning and I was running a few minutes late. I pictured my hair stylist getting all nervous if I arrived late to my appointment. He worked on such a tight schedule. I found a parking spot in front of his salon and was rushing through the front door when …. yes, when.
As I rushed into the salon a woman was in the process of walking out. I was walking at such a fast pace that I almost knocked her over. My leg brakes stopped me inches away from her. She was beautiful. I was about to apologize for almost knocking her over but I was dazzled by her bearing. I was speechless and tongue tied. I stared at her and she was staring right back. Neither of us said a word.
The hair stylist intervened. He said “Art, not only are you a few minutes late but you almost knocked over one of my most valued clients.” Still, neither of us moved or said a word. The hair stylist looked at her, then at me and immediately sized up the situation.
He said “You know, I think you two should meet. You’re both single and I’ll be happy to host cocktails at a nearby bar. But not right now because I’ve got to get rid of all the hair that Art grew during the past four weeks and I’m booked for the rest of the day. I’ll arrange it for some time during the next few weeks. Is that okay with the two of you?”
She spoke first. “I’d love that.” I spoke second. “Me, too.”
Two weeks later the three of us met in a bar and had a wonderful time. She was bright, funny and endearing. We clicked. That was two years ago. We’ve been an item ever since. From that day on the first thing I would do in the morning was read my horoscope. I never did unsubscribe and I’m glad I didn’t.
That was the most daring horoscope I had ever seen. And yet it came true. To this day I’m still amazed. No other horoscope since then has gone out on such a limb as to predict something as specific and precise as that one did. How did that astrologist single me out? I’m eagerly awaiting her upcoming horoscope which will tell me that I was going to become a billionaire that day.