Shell Shocked: Bucket Lists Revisited
Ever since I saw the movie “The Bucket List,” about two aging men who decide to try things they’ve never done before, I made my own to-do list. As adventurous a life as my memory bank tells me I’ve had, I also realize that there were many things I’d never done before. Among them are:
1. I’ve never been in a war.
2. I’ve never played the violin.
3. I’ve never made love to Brigitte Bardot.
4. I never threw a fast ball past Ted Williams.
5. I’ve never been in a submarine.
6. I’ve never been chased by a bear.
7. I’ve never robbed a bank.
8. I’ve never climbed Mount Everest.
9. I was never mayor of New York.
10. I’ve never been shot at.
11. I’ve never been divorced.
12. I never ran for public office.
13. I never sky dived out of a plane.
14. I never swam the English Channel
15. I’ve never had an audience with Queen Elizabeth.
16. I never had my appendix removed.
17. I’ve never been to India.
18. I never won the Nobel Prize.
19. I’ve never had my home broken into.
20. I never won Publishing Clearing House millions.
21. I never grew a beard or a mustache.
22. I never collected stamps or coins or match books.
23. I’ve never been to the moon.
24. I never lived on the Bowery.
So much for those things I haven’t done. Now what about those things I actually did do.
1. I had my tonsils removed.
2. I’ve been to Des Moines, Iowa.
3. I’ve been to the Bronx.
4. I won a sixth grade spelling bee.
5. I played Nick Sherlock in the high school production of “The Mystery of Moldy Manor.”
6. I played the “Moonlight Sonata” on the piano when I was twelve.
7. I took a helicopter tour of Baltimore.
8. I was once pick pocketed in a New York City office building elevator.
9. I wandered through the Casbah in Marrakesh.
10. I was once a teenager.
11. I sang “Mairzy Doats and Dozy Doats” in my third grade class.
12. I read “The Amboy Dukes” when I was thirteen.
13. I once tobogganed down a hill.
14. I once bought a house in Sanibel.
There’s plenty left to be done. I can still dream about climbing Mt. Everest while settling into a La-Z-Boy recliner with a glass of robust Cabernet.